Creative guilt, Part 2: You said WHAT?!

Wow. You are smart, readers. I posted a piece (blogged a post? wrote into the computer?) about creativity and how working in an uncreative field makes me feel like a failure sometimes, like I’m letting my true creative-self down. The main conclusion of my post, or my suggestion to me and anyone else who feels this pang of guilt, was to reject the idea that your job defines you, and to embrace the creative endeavors you want to embrace.

Decent ideas, sure, but when I read your responses I was just like “Oh…oh DANG!” because it turns out that a whole slew of people had a similar story, and the beautiful part was that everyone had a different perspective, which makes me feel like there is a conversation that needs to happen around this. Therefore, let’s chat. And by chat I do mean on the computer, in the comment boxes below. Let me give you some examples of what I’ve learned from you thus far:

Creative professionals feel creative guilt too.

Shocking, I know! A few brilliant and creative people who actually make a living on their creative know-how said that sometimes they feel guilty for creating work that’s “too commercial” or that by the end of the day, after putting their creative energy into making things for other people, they’re too drained by to think about creating something  personally.

Creativity needs to be welcomed into your life.

One reader suggested that we allow creativity “in the home of your day, make a little room for your creativity to live in. and then go in, visit, have some tea with it, dance around with it, yell as loud as you can out the window with it…” Thanks, poetic reader! I love this idea though, of welcoming creativity into your life and committing to let it stay. Knowing that you have invited this thing in, and to feel the pull that it creates, but to feel it in a peaceful way. Move into my spare bedroom, creativity.

Your job does not define you, but neither do your hobbies.

Someone made this comment and it really struck me. You don't need to be defined by anything. Your creative expression is this practice of curating your life in a way that you want. YES! You express your creativity through your style of clothing, or the way you make your lunch every day. Not huge things, but if you take a step back, it’s amazing. You, just as you are, being yourself, now and always. It’s this amazing work of art, honestly and you're the only one who can make it.

If I could sum up your responses so far, it’s that this whole creative guilt thing is a result of perspective. It’s so relative, and it’s something that we could probably turn into a positive thing instead.

What else? I would love, love, LOVE for you all to see each other’s ideas here. Honestly, the night after I posted the last piece, I was reading emails and comments from people and like, bouncing around the house because I felt like we were all on the same page. And isn’t that the best feeling, really?  So tell me what you do to bring creativity into your life, challenges you find, what you’re working on, etc. TELL ME ALL OF THE THINGS PLEASE.

xoxox

Alexis

Creative guilt v. cat scarves

Let's say there is a creative thing you’re drawn to like painting or making clay pots or knitting tiny scarves for cats. Let's say you're not doing this thing, or you're not doing it as much as you'd like, and that “not doing” is eating you up? You could call that creative guilt.

Feeling like you're letting your creative, dream-self down? It’s the pits, you guys.

I totally fight with myself on this all of the time, especially with my job.  It’s not fulfilling my desires to create beautiful things and collaborate with people on said things and help children learn or start a goat farm (those are my dreams, yes, what of it?).  Guess what desire it does fulfill? My desire to pay my rent and not worry about grocery shopping and to feel like a productive being.  Having been on the other side of this fulfillment, I can tell you, it can bring you down, man. Don't discount those basic desires. They're pretty fulfilling too.

Oh, but the creative guilt! It’s so mean.  I see friends who are making it in their chosen creative field and I feel like I failed.

Here’s a thought I had today, whilst attempting to leave the personal pity party I was attending: What about turning the guilt around and just admitting that we’re searching and hungry? Hungry to express ourselves, to talk to other people about whatever it is our art is, and feel like we belong in that conversation. There’s a lot of snobbery in the world of art and creativity I think, like your art isn’t art because it’s not something enough. Ugh. Shut up with that garbage.

 Or, if I spend 45 hours a week at an accounting firm, staring at a computer, and only 4 hours a week (or less) on wood working and doing an hour or two of writing, then I’m not an artist, or a writer, or a woodworker. I think that the challenge is not defining ourselves simply by what we’re doing most of the time. No, I’m not a professional wood worker. Why? Because my income does not come from woodworking, not because I suck at it. I do it though, right? And that's GOOD becuase if I stopped doing it because I felt like "oh, well I'm not legit, I don't commit myself to it 100% of time", then I wouldn't be doing it AT ALL.

I guess my point is that, I’m going to stop worrying that there’s this unfulfilled creative person living inside my corporate routine that hates me. I’m going to try to accept that I can be a person who isn’t defined by their job, and that attacking my free time with creativity sounds kind of scary yet amazing.  Honestly, go sing in the shower, write the words down when you get out, and head to work. Tomorrow, maybe you sing it again. Next weekend, you ask a friend to play the guitar while you sing it because why not? Just don’t stop. If you decide to dedicate your life to your creative practice then I am in full support and I think you’re fantastic, but it’s not like “quit your job and be creative” or “keep job, never be creative” are the only options for everyone.

Creativity is a journey, which is an overused word but I really like it. Creating art is a journey and it shouldn’t be another opportunity to tell yourself you can’t, because you have a boring office job or you’re too young or you’re too old. Just stop.

So lay off yourself and go figure out what it is you want. Make a birdhouse or write a play or sing songs about your dog or paint portraits of your friends.  Just make sure you do it. Shove a sock in the mouth of guilt and inadequacy and get on with it. Oh, and then please tell me what happened because I’m really excited just thinking about it.