Where have I been for the last few weeks, you may ask? I have been super busy making mistakes, just for you! Not really, but I have been moving, and finding out my new place doesn't take dogs, and getting really mad because they originally said I could and then I had to move again and throw money all around like a person with loads of money, because moving is expensive you guys! So I've been doing lots of thinking, mostly of the "wtf is wrong with me, I'm such a dummy, what am I doing with a dog anyway, she's a total jerk anyway, I just want to go live on a farm where things are cheap and raise goats and have babies". Not a rational thought process, but that's the beauty of freaking out-you don't have to make a lick of sense.
Having stuff kind of blow up in your face is, I think, a great opportunity to remember what's important. Yes, it's hard when, at the end of the day, the only positive statement you can make about the day is "well, I'm not dead". That's rough, but it's true, right? You made it through the day. Maybe you're so broke it feels slightly dangerous, or you got in a screaming fight with some you love and feel like there's no way to fix it. That's when I stop and, after stomping around the house and shrieking into my pillow I remember that we are in control of so little, and that you just have to try your best and hope things work, because it has before, and at the end of the day, remember that you're still alive. Even if you're paying for everything with nickels, and your dog ate the down comforter and your new shoes, and somebody stole your laundry out of the laundry room (no, I'm serious, this has been a doozy of a month) you're still doing you, and absolutely no one else can do that or stop you.
Let's vacuum up the feathers, throw out the obliterated shoes, cook up some ramen noodles and get on with it, shall we?
xo
